What bipolar might look like to the kids

When a mom has bipolar disorder, the whole family has the ups and downs. When she's up, she does such cool things: You get to run around going to the park, sliding at McDonald's, signing up for gymnastics and ballet and music lessons and everything else equally fun. Life is exciting and thrilling.

Then she crashes. She is in bed, or on the couch, or just staying in the house, in her robe, while you get to watch tv. Lots of tv. Maybe you get to play a lot of video games (which is fun, too). You may get dragged to a lot of doctors, which is really boring. You eat a lot of fast food, or maybe you eat things you find in the refrigerator and cabinets, whatever you or your dad can find or make because Mom is too tired to cook.

Gradully, things improve. Mom gets out of bed and starts acting more like herself. She moves a little slower, she may seem distracted and not interested, which is really the medication. Sometimes she sleeps more and you get to watch tv or play video games, although not as much as you did before, because she doesn't sleep as much as she did before.

Then everything smooths out and mom finally comes out of the down time. It's not a high, but it's not the low. You go to the park, or to McDonald's, you may sign up for gymnastics or ballet or music, but not all at once. She's finally acting like the mom you had before she got sick, had her breakdown, whatever you call it.

There are still some ups and downs, but they aren't really noticiable to you. She may take a nap during the day, or stay home for a few days in a row. She may cook and clean and shop a lot for a few days, then go back to her regular self. Nothing that won't register until one day, as an adult, you can look back and see the variations.

So that is a generalization of what life looks like when you have a mom with bipolar disorder. Fortunately, because she's the only mom you have, it will all look normal to you, and you love her regardless, and by the time you realize that all moms don't behave this way, I hope it won't be important that she's different.